The self-hatred and self-disgust is finally back.
I stepped on the scale today and although I know I can't trust the scale due to the fact that I am not "completely empty" the weight is still unbearbable high even if I reduce it a lil bit.
Argh.
This feeling is so horrible.
I have this feeling like 11 weeks will be never enough to get back to the 51's and I am gonna be fat and wibbly and wobbly and so soft and simply dis-gus-ting.
Yes I am unpatient.
Yes I am unreasonable.
But still.
The feeling of fuglyness is back.
SHould I be happy because this might support my weight loss?
meeeh
I think I'm gonna vanish into thin air 'cause anyway I am just a waste of space.
Literally.
Who needs fat apart from the food industry?
Once upon a time I was slim,slender,in other persons' opinion even "skinny/thin". Now it is all gone.And it is all my fault. There should be a punishment for stupidity. I feel like I don not even deserve to go to this Beauty Day this evening...
I feel like I don't deserve anything but diet coka,water and air.
Sorry for being such a whiney bitch.
=(
I feel like I don't deserve anything but diet coka,water and air.
Sorry for being such a whiney bitch.
=(
3 Kommentare:
Stupid scale. Fuck it, have fun tonight! Those pictures will make you feel inspired... and you will see how beautiful you are!
xoxo zen
You are not a waste of space!! You will be back into the 51s, you'll see :)
Go Mina!! :D
(Soz, I'm posting drunk XD)
Yeah, 580cals in a coffee that was like 4cups of sugary, creamy awesomeness! Starbucks is the devil, I swear!!
How have you been, hun? The cycling sounds awesome.
xoxo
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