I want to disappear

Freitag, 26. März 2010
Call me a bitch
Call me ugly
Call me fat
Call me worthless
Just notice me.
Somehow.
Tell me you don't care a damn about me.
Just talk to me.
 Say I'm not worth it,
say there's simply no point.
Just say anything to me.
Why do I feel so horribly sad, solely cause you're not there?
Why is there so much pain inside me? Just because of you.
Wh am I trying to kid? Everything seems so useless right now.
Yell at me, hit me, say "YOu're stupid I'm not interested" righ tinto my face.
Just do something.
Anything. At all.
Why can't I just forget about you, erase every single thought and wish...?
There is just pain and frustration, 
you're not good for me..I know but still...
Still I care way too much when I shouldn't.
Still my heart seems to be only yours, though my mind knows I'm only damaging myself.
Why?
Why??
Heart and mind-the big never aneding battle.
How is this story supposed to end?
I don't know how to go on with this unbearable situation,
still there seems to be no resort.
Damnity,damn damn 
why is life so complicated?
And I keep on falling, falling down.
Drowning in my thoughts and emotions.


Written by
not really sober Mina



3 Kommentare:

Peridot (G+P) hat gesagt…

*Hugs* I take it that the guy was a cuntsack? Shall I bash him for you?

minaralou hat gesagt…

yes please you shall!
jezz I estimate I babbled lika an hour with a good male friend of mine about him,complaining moaning and being pissed,wishing I could erase him out of my life cause he iy only another heavy pound of problem I have to bear -.-*
male friend was really nice though just as the two other girls I talked to about this topic( and the one's BF know most likely too xD) all trying to encourage me and not lose hope blahblah
pls shoot yourself in your foot EX special boy ... seriously, how can I still be so bothered by his behaviour when I just spend a few hours in our local parc with a tremendous amount of other drunken people and could CLEARLY see that due to whatever reasons he has been attacked by a mentionable amount of spots/acne

Savory Sweet hat gesagt…

*kisses you on the head* Feel better my love. Some people don't deserve your light and cheer.

Congrats on your new low!!!

Some sayings and quotes I like...


"If you're looking for me, I'm hovering around phrensis, more precisely on the thin line between phrenesis and panic, just round the corner of deadly terror and not very far away from despair and idiocy!"
♦Sooner or later everyone will cause you pain…You just have to figure out which ones are worth it.
Smile. It’s easier than explaining why you’re sad…
Behind my smile is a hurting heart, behind my laugh I’m falling apart. Look closely at me and you will see, the girl I am, it isn’t me…
My knight in shinig armour turned out to be a looser in aluminium foil
What's better? A lie, that drwas a smile (and satisfies) or the truth that draws a tear?
♦(translatet) I am my own hell,my own paradise,a fallen angel, that plunged herself into ruin
Technically, one simply gets unhappy by pondering.
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain!
I'm not afraid of Happy Endings.I'm just afraid my life won't work that way..

The only reason people hold on memories so tight is because memories are the only thing that won't change when everything else does.
Every time a child says"I don't believe in fairies" there's a little fairy somewhere that falls down dead"-Peter Pan

"When you lose the battle
You may as well give up the war"


.... nothing tastes as good as thin feels....sacrifice is giving up something good for something way better.....

When I hate...

When I hate
this stretch of skin
this bulge of thigh
this clinging fat
these beady eyes

When I hate
this stomach flab
this sagging chest
this chunky butt
these too small breasts

When I lose
my sense of self
my dignity
my pride in all
that makes up me

When I lose
this ugly face
this state of mind
my worst disgrace
then I'll be fine.
Then I'll be fine.
You'll see, I'm fine.
~Ant (Morgan S.)~