Scribblings of my disordered eating (life) ...: world upside down

Am I being paranoid or is my family lately trying to stuff me with carbs?! -.-*

Sunday_ Have to eat a small porton of bloody rice although I have my usuall veggie mix AND some spinach... normally I get away with that

Monday_ My nice *sarcams* father just mixes up my asian veggie mix with some rice,never used to do that

Tuesday_ No I can not just eat my beloved veggies, I have to eat noodles as well

GODDAMMIT YOU ALL KNOW DAMN WELL I HATE NOODLES AND RICE!!!

So far you have been rather nice most of the time and did not make me eat such stuff or merely once a week ,what have I done that you are constantly provoking me with this crap?

I.don't.need.this.crap.

Just a few days ago I told them that there are loads of carbs in veggies and fruits as well and OF COURSE potatoes,which I like to eat

....

Evene worse: my sister' 11th birthday on Sunday.What does she want to eat?

CHICKEN WINGS,FRENCH FRIES

I would be totally fine with that,cause NORMALLY I do not have to eat crappy french fries.

They know I dislike them² - the last time when I was ahving a really bad bingy day and asked to get some french fries too they were really surprised going all " Really? Thought you did not like them" -

It isn't even healthy!!!! It is actually know to be unhealthy, no precious special vitamines or nutrients or stuff...

It makes me soo angry that recently they are all on the "We accept so much of your eating habits(veganism) so you damn well eat the same stuff as we do if there is nothing unvegan in it!-.-"

I WILL BE FORCED TO EAT FRENCH FRIES BY PEOPLE WHO LOOK ANXIOUSLY IN EVERYTHING's INGREDIENT LIST TO CHECK WHETHER THERE IS GLUTAMATE IN IT AND CONSTANTLY ANNOY MY OTHER SIBLINGS TO EAT (more) FRUITS THAN JUST AN APPLE PER WEEK

!!!

I feel the strong urge to smack them

Some sayings and quotes I like...

♦"If you're looking for me, I'm hovering around phrensis, more precisely on the thin line between phrenesis and panic, just round the corner of deadly terror and not very far away from despair and idiocy!"

♦Sooner or later everyone will cause you pain…You just have to figure out which ones are worth it.
♦Smile. It’s easier than explaining why you’re sad…
♦Behind my smile is a hurting heart, behind my laugh I’m falling apart. Look closely at me and you will see, the girl I am, it isn’t me…
♦My knight in shinig armour turned out to be a looser in aluminium foil
♦What's better? A lie, that drwas a smile (and satisfies) or the truth that draws a tear?
♦(translatet) I am my own hell,my own paradise,a fallen angel, that plunged herself into ruin
♦Technically, one simply gets unhappy by pondering.
♦Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain!
♦I'm not afraid of Happy Endings.I'm just afraid my life won't work that way..
♦The only reason people hold on memories so tight is because memories are the only thing that won't change when everything else does.
♦Every time a child says"I don't believe in fairies" there's a little fairy somewhere that falls down dead"-Peter Pan

♦"When you lose the battle
You may as well give up the war"

.... nothing tastes as good as thin feels....sacrifice is giving up something good for something way better.....

Behind the mask...

Well,if you saw me you'd think I'm just a girl doing well in this world,maybe a bit pale but that's it- actually I'm anything but "normal".

To my friends,I'm the nice blonde veggie girl,addicted to Great Britain,tough,self-confident,sometimes a bit too mouthy but all in one a young,intelligent girl that knows what life is all about .. if they could look into my head and see what's really going on inside me they'd probably run away terribly terrified...

My life consists of the Me I appear to be on the outside and the real Me,which I can only live out on the internet,in my diary or in my head.

Btw, I'm german so pls forgive any mistakes.

I came here to share my thoughts with like-minded persons as you,because I think this is the only place to in a community where I can let my social mask of normality fall and be truthful, above all else. =)

2 Kommentare:

zen hat gesagt…: Oh no. That's tough. Just stick to portion control. Stay strong!

xoxo zen; 9. März 2010 um 21:43
Peridot (G+P) hat gesagt…: Oh urk! I always hated how my parents seemed to have one set of rules for me and another set of rules for my little brothers D:

I'd grab one exact serving of fries and be really obvious about eating them. SEE, LOOK! I'M EATING THE BLASTED FRIES ALREADY!! *Huggles*; 10. März 2010 um 11:15

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Scribblings of my disordered eating (life) ...

world upside down

2 Kommentare:

Some sayings and quotes I like...

When I hate...

useful&interesting stuff

My appreaciated followers

Mind over matter and I won't get fatter

Behind the mask...

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